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Nicolas Cage film 'The Surfer' induces knee-buckling six minute standing ovation at Cannes

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While the revelatory thrill might be gone, there's still something that hits you in the guts when the water starts sucking backwards in that tight little apex of the tank and a tube appears out of nowhere…

On a rain-soaked Friday afternoon two weeks ago, I had the enormous pleasure of examining the new $75 million Sydney wavepool alongside the noted sexagenarian surfing brothers, Nicholas and Thomas Carroll, men for whom age does not weary nor years condemn etc. The great Nick Carroll, sixty-five and still a geyser of testosterone, treats the tube with contempt. Photo: Matt Dunbar

Also in attendance, an entourage of Instagram influencers, the photographer Billy Morris, eighties tour shredder Rob Bain and the Bondi-based editor of Tracks magazine, Luke Kennedy.

There's a helluva lot less excitement when it comes to pools opening than there was four years ago when the Melbourne tank became Australian's first wavepool, when you'd peer through the wire construction fences to see the first test waves rolling through, bringing shrieks of delight even when they were punched to pieces by that raw Victorian wind.

Back then, I enjoyed Urbnsurf's hospitality from one through til six as part of a media reveal. It was very hot that day, one hundred degrees Fahrenheit. With fourteen surfers in the water and eight-wave sets every two minute one wave was caught every four minutes.

Staff still call it the day of days. Tanning poolside at the pre-opening of the Melbourne tank.

That same week, on the Friday, I joined the party of an old friend who had hired the joint from nine am until eight pm.

I spent seven hours or thereabouts in the water and caught, at a conservative estimate, one hundred waves.

Two very exciting days, and both still warm in my memory.

It's a different experience this time. Daddy's leg don't work, operation forthcoming in three weeks, so he gifts his kids the two sessions, the first turns, the second, barrels.

And, while the revelatory thrill might be gone, there's still something that hits you in the guts when the water starts sucking backwards in the apex of the tank and a three-foot tube appears out of nowhere and no one is there to hassle you for it; no one's gonna push the lip down on your head, push you too deep or too wide. Another mini-DR, Jones Rielly, folds the rear hinge to max time in the cabana. Photo: Matt Dunbar

And the water colour, oowee, it's a shocking cobalt blue, as inviting as a warm fire cutting through logs.

So what's difference between the Melbourne tank and Sydney?

Well, both are Wavegarden tech but there's been four years to work out the kinks and while it may not be immediately obvious there are improvements.

The first is, Melbourne was built next to an airport and adjacent to an Aussie Rules football ground nicknamed Windy Hill. And even if you're told the wind don't affect the waves 'cause there's zero fetch for the wind to do its terrible biz, they do, even if it's an aesthetic thing. Sydney crouches below a hill and dips away from any exposure to a raw wind.

So, yeah, waves are smooth.

Second thing is the water temp. It gets insanely cold in a Melbourne winter and the water temp will dip below ten degrees celsius, 50F.

So, Sydney, down to maybe fourteen, fifteen, 57, 59F, at the peak of the winter. Right now, a couple weeks out of winter, it's eighteen or 65 F.

Sessions cost either $109 or $159. The cheaper sessions you'll share with 17 other surfers, netting you ten or twelve waves, depending if the session is full and if you milk the things to the bitter end and lose your place in line.

The more expensive expert session has twelve surfers, meaning you'll get eighteen waves and plenty of room and time to decipher how to thread the so-called Beast. Tip: punch down on your tail after the takeoff and you'll ride the length of the drainpipe.

Helmets aren't compulsory but, as in the snow game, they're starting to become more popular and you can hire 'em if you want a little extra confidence heading into a Beast sesh.

It ain't such a bad idea. I've seen two head injuries, and at the presser this time a kid belted his head on the bottom.

If you're into the idea of using pools as air-camps, you might've written off the Wavegardens preferring the American Wave Machine ramps of Waco and Brazil's Boa Vista.

Until real recently, if they wanted to create an air section, Wavegarden would install a temporary reef. Now, they can do it using the existing modules. Only prob is they can only use one side of the pool and there's only forty waves instead of 216 an hour.

Still, they plan on opening up some sorta air session to the public this Christmas-ish.

Book here if you can find an opening.

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